Monday, February 27, 2017

Thoughts: Groups --- Day 6/7

Walk: Monday Errands
Distance: 3 miles, Yoga

So last night Ciwt went to an Oscars Party at her new (old) club.  She didn't know what to wear but had heard people came in costumes.  Even if she had one, she somehow couldn't imagine competing with the stars in a beautiful gown.  And she has some bling, but the pieces she would have worn look so real she didn't want people to think she had jewels like that.  (Which has happened in the past without her realizing it with people talking amongst themselves about how Rich Ciwt was).

So....she decided to go as Oscars Worst Dressed.  Fun!! She had a hat like Cher's Image result for cher oscar dresses  in 1998, Red Gloves like Lady GaGa in 2015 Image result for lady gaga red gloves oscars
sunglasses like Celine Dion in 1999 Image result for celine dion oscar tuxedo, and for good measure Ciwt threw on a pair of black sweats in a nod to Demi Moore's 1989 biker shortsImage result for demi moore bike shorts oscars  . For "Worst Dressed" Ciwt thought she looked quite happening.

Okay, she gets to the club and finds...NO silly costumes.  Except hers.  Everyone is dressed to the nines in black and glitter and bling.  ONE person gets what Ciwt's look is all about.  One!  Who knows what the others made of Ciwt's hat, sweats, red gloves - for the entire long, long Oscar evening.

Why is Ciwt telling you this?  As an opening to a sort of True Confessions.  Being different - unintentionally - in groups isn't new to Ciwt.  Taking a humorous approach when absolutely no one else does - or appears to even get it - is also totally un-new to Ciwt.  She goes to group events (when she does) thinking "we'll all have fun and laugh" and gets there to find everyone else is pretty serious.  So there's that to handle - the disappointment about lack of humor (frankly) and the getting through.  And then there is the coming home and the next day - today - vaguely wondering if she did something wrong (again) and fully aware she'll probably do something similar in the future.

This is often how Groups play out for Ciwt and why she likes being 1. alone 2. with Callie 3. with a few trusted fun, funny friends - not in any particular order.  But something in her also feels it is somehow important to challenge herself and continue her 'group work.'

So now, in this 6th year,  you know a bit more about Ciwt.  She can also tell you about a couple of friends from the old days who had what Ciwt thinks must have been the ultimately challenging Only Person in Silly Costumes Evening.

Her friends were petty classy and hobnobing with the ultimate swells out here when San Francisco used to be Ultimately Swell. One of the couples in the Swell Crowd sent out invitations for a "Come As You Are" Party.  (Remember those?; you get a call and then are expected to come as you are dressed at the moment).

Their call came in while they were sitting around in bathrobes.  Oh dear, not their choice of party outfits, but being good sports they decided to really ham it up: rollers, shaving cream, the whole works.  Off they went to the Ultimately Swell house where the butler opened the door and they walked through to find that they were the Only ones in costume.  No one else had a wrinkle in their gown/tux or a hair out of place, and you just know people like that are not going to find the couple in the bathrobes amusing.  It was a very long evening - and a great story for years after.

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